Gaia Community: AainaA's Blog

What color is your current state of mind?

http://AainaA.gaia.com — Tue, 18 Dec 2007 08:28:38 GMT

I'm translucent at the moment - and the only to paint this expression would be through the energy, and breath transpired through the quanta wavelets we reach touching each other, creating, embracing... & loving

Tags: QaR, colors, mood, hue, feelings

Bonne Année 2007

http://AainaA.gaia.com — Mon, 08 Jan 2007 11:28:18 GMT

I've been terribly busy lately. Who isn't when the world is in chaos?

The NGO I'm attached to has yet to be launched, although we envisage seeing it coming into reality sometime March/April, but that's my crystal ball talking, and no, the Executive Director doesn't know either. I hope it'll be soon, because though we may have all the time within this encapsulated universe we're neither in and yet are {so to speak}, the world may not be there when we're ready to serve it.

Time is of the essence, and yes, one has to bless every single ottosecond to the fullest, embracing every breath the heart prays to. We tend to forget we do have hearts sometimes don't we? Especially when we're fighting to ensure other people's lives are enamoured with life.

I'm hoping to have my book published soon, since I'm not getting anywhere with Organizations promising many things. At least with the book sale, I will be able to setup the Universal Foundation for Women, & Children, and start working on it. There are projects in lined, but it can be a tad difficult when you're working with another organization, and your little foundation has yet to be concretised off the blueprint.

Meanwhile, both my sites are up, and officially "re-launched". Do visit us when you can find the time. AuliiA Online would be a good read if you're into proactive & provoking articles. AainaA Lifestyle, is back up again, our server suddenly disappeared conveniently at the Data Centre, and timely too when it burnt itself out. Oh yes, the few things we seriously need to look into apart from setting up, and maintaining sites.

Then there was that recent earthquake in Taiwan, and me being in Malaysia - our connection just came to a halt - so you can imagine how frantic most of us from this part of the world were. There must be a way to overcome disasters - maybe if you're working in Satellite Communication, you would consider a new not too costly application / service that will benefit the world {not to mention your company!}

I wish all, you especially reading this blog, a thoughtful, and fruitful year ahead, and yes, it may be a tad too late to wish you glad tidings, my thoughts + prayers are with you.. always,

Love,
AA

Tags: Glad Tidings, AainaA Lifestyle, AuliiA Online, NGO, Book, Time, Satellite Communication

IQRA!

http://AainaA.gaia.com — Fri, 08 Sep 2006 12:57:14 GMT

The approach to everything material must be spiritual. Without which apparentness of the hidden and perceived creation even in thought-forms will not be formed or be concrete enough despite the etherical aspects of its characteristics in the worlds of the apparent creation.

Creation of a form springs forth from a thought-form and every thought-form is an underlying veil {the matter} that the Spirit forms to have it perceived tangibly. To say the apparentness of the hidden and perceived is void of any spiritual matter is to revoke the very essence of The Word {the creation}.

A thought-form takes shape fearlessly, without concern of how the painting {The Word} is formed {within its apparent and hidden aspects}, or read by the Eyes that see all, the Consciousness' that comprehend all, the Breaths, that is Living.

Since I have been thinking like this since the age of "three" {although age is another matter The Word takes unto itself}, I have found with difficulty that choice thinking and vision-logic is not really apparent amongst adults... it took me a while to find the correct words to form a corrective message to hit the hearts so to speak.

Looking back and reverting to the past towards your future would be one way to look {think} how much we've evolved over the years, millennias to form the perfect paragraph, the story the Universe is "telling" us to Read.

IQRA!

Tags: Iqra, Read, Universe, Spiritual, Thinking

Amidst You

http://AainaA.gaia.com — Fri, 01 Sep 2006 08:20:24 GMT

I sit amidst You, My Love
rubbing shoulders, extending
hugs, not in violent blows
slithered across your
neck slaughtered as in
bestial rituals of command &
Conquer

I sit amidst You, My Love
These tears, pearls they formed
To grace the finger of your
Chosen beloved whose heart's
Devoid of life, the idol you
Worship in blinded lust

I sit amidst your laughter & your
Pain, my arms outstretched, the
Extension of your prayers for
Eternal love, yet shun you
The eyes looking deep within

…

Deep within your grieving heart

…

I sit amidst You, My Love
Not in churches, nor
Synagogues; nor Masjiids or
Temples, nor in rituals of faith
Enrobed with incense insane

Kiss these lips and live forever
Eternity within a moment of
Desire; this death is but a
Taste, a journey the Soul takes
In living forever

I sit amidst You, My Love
Remembering the promise we once
Vowed each other, in couple
We embraced forming the unformed
Breathing Life unto a Love, formed

Tags: Love, Life, Promise, Prayer

On Creation

http://AainaA.gaia.com — Fri, 01 Sep 2006 07:35:07 GMT

A Salmon's roe is worth much more than all the monies of all the worlds.

Never in a million years will mankind be able to replicate another man, from lightwaves. Until all the world's resources are exhausted, mankind will plunder the earth to prove his blind ignorance and arrogance.

How can a heart devoid of You ever comprehend the nature of living let alone define freedom. How can a heart bereft of attributes comprehend the Essence.

Tags: Theosophie, Life, Light

AainaA

http://AainaA.gaia.com — Mon, 07 Aug 2006 03:50:33 GMT

The eyes see yet perceives not the One
Glorify passion embraced in Veils
Veiling not as rituals ware
Rather veiling in shyness Beauty

The One Alone, Hidden yet unveiled
Within the garbs of commonness, A
King amidst paupers arms outstretched
in prayers virgil

Embrace the Kiss, oh friends!
Kill not The mortal self, Immortal
unNamed UnFormed

For thou art Heart
amidst all hearts
...

Rejab 1427

[x]

Tags: Heart, Humanity, Life, One, AainaA, Hu

Changing The World!

http://AainaA.gaia.com — Sat, 15 Jul 2006 05:47:54 GMT

Upon reaching home last night, I saw a huge box on the dining table. Curious as ever, I thought it would contain magazines sent in by the EU Council. They've been sending me tons of magazines since EU came into the picture.

Keeping me abreast to what things are being developed for the EU public, schools and ...

Then my heart skipped a beat!

Its from Zaadz. {Eh... I didn't order anything. If any, it most likely be a stack of books and Amazon couldn't have sent those overnight. I'm in Malaysia}

The Ambassador's kit arrived. Mum literally embraced the tee-shirt. I could see she wanted to donne it as soon as I took it out of the box. And...

Books

Tons of books {well, I'm exagerating, but still. there were at least four} and magazines, and ...goodies to turn your heart into a kid again.

Last night, I became a kid again for the quadrillionth time

Tomorrow, I'll post the flyers around town

and....

meet people and we'll change the world!

Tags: Change, Love, Unity, World, Zaadz

Unformed

http://AainaA.gaia.com — Thu, 13 Jul 2006 11:29:13 GMT

Formless, formed from within Light
Water droplets within clouds
And smiles as growth permeates
On earth trodden, and dried, murdered
Of hands toiled in brazen heat

Breaths exhaled
Danced beings within veils
Embraced aliken yarns of endless pain
Tearing tears, breaking hearts
Of endings that seem bleak in an unending flight

The bumblebee flies around the Light
Infused perfume of moistened glazed honey
Amidst flowers delight, danced hearts enjoyed
When tongues suckle the sweetness of Life
Light unto Light, uniting strengths in Faith

Each cloak of Knowledge infuses Hope, within
Bents untouched, aspired and yearned, jumped the
Hearts devoid of Love, how insecure Life can be
Naught if only,

…'

Aliken bumblebee toils the hands
With Love, embraced within sheets of blankets
Veiled the dances of lusts, and grained within colors
Of voices, unheard, unsung

…'

Unformed

Tags: Dance, Life, Light, Unformed

The Humble Earth

http://AainaA.gaia.com — Wed, 28 Jun 2006 07:03:39 GMT

I am not excusing myself, if I want to fart today. I have been absorbing a lot of waves, and inhaling vibes from humans lately, sometimes I wonder why I never became the Blimp , floating in seventh heaven

I'll tell you why - my feet are magnetically drawn to the earth you trod upon. It helps to be grounded sometimes. This way, the wastes are being re-absorbed for a cyclic evolution within the biosphere of the humble earth.

Each of our breath, actions, and thoughts too, should be grounded. If we speak without thinking, we can create wars and enmities. And that is not the reason as to why we're here. We're not here as beings, human to kill each other, or to vex each other every quadrillionth of an Otto second. We're here to evolve - either down up or up down {isra'miraj / ascension}. Our system is designed specifically for that, amongst others. It is not designed to kill.

We're not guns and bullets.

Our steps should lead us to inner peace - a state of mind humans crave for, especially now in the 21st century.Friday evening, I absorbed too much vengeance, hatred and pain throughout the week enough to induce cancer that will last another millennia for humanity. Upon reaching home, I didn't have enough energy to even turn the key in the keyhole to unlock the door. By the time I staggered into the house, and slowly walked to my bedroom, switching on the air-conditioning, an onslaught of waves enveloped me, and I fainted on the bed.

Under my eyelids, I see a myriad of images replayed of how the proclaimed faithful human, with their words and actions, kill themselves indirectly. I see an image of a soldier, proclaiming himself human, a knife in his hand bending over a blind-folded civilian and heartlessly, slicing the neck of the prisoner-of-war letting a gush of blood, like fountain to seep into the earth in a ritual of bestiality. I also see, pretenders in the love of The Lord, trading religion with their lips whilst they indulge in pleasurable sins themselves. I see picture of chaos of an ailing civilization, too proud to evolve propagating peace through violence. I see people embracing the black arts under the pretext of contemporary art whilst they parade like new-born babies in loin cloths, bottling-up reincarnation; stars falling from the skies, light-saucers zapping in and out of the heavens, and... Jesus, in a resurrection and beautiful as ever, descending, his arms out-stretched, as the winds bellow in a dance fervour, ruptured amidst emotions filled tears engorged, slither in clenched throats.

I also saw you, tears in your eyes, praying for comfort, seeking for an early death.

Each breath is an evolution. When you inhale from within, and exhale in the apparent world, a death is consumed. Humans proclaim believing in The One, Alone. Yet actions and words do not reflect that love for the One, Alone. Are our proclamations to love for the One, Alone mere lip service? Or do we let our emotions and inner demons control what we gloriously self-proclaim being, human are?

When you want to do service to Him Alone, try to perceive beyond the apparent reality. Dilate your inner eyes beyond what is just a gauge for the ordinary. The humble earth perceives and experiences a joy of subtlety, a refined education throughout years and moments of stillness.

Be still, and know that You are..
A Being, Human from The Heavens

{..more}

Tags: Hope, Humility, Life, Unity, Living, Humble Earth, AuliiA

The King's Robe

http://AainaA.gaia.com — Tue, 11 Apr 2006 13:19:36 GMT

The Reality within the multifaceted mirrors and its reflections therein

It revolves like the earth, a planet bright
in dance fervour, embraces faceted
personalities of you, and me, like the earth
its colours share mysteries, unearth
and calling like unspoilt dragons' breath
awaiting the punishment

Like a painting, the brushes dripped with
Emotions, how long can tastes endure in
the heart when all life breathe an evolution

I call the Winds, The Suns... and Spirits
Conjure this spell, and unbreak the Silence
I have seen Heaven's Seat, and sat like a King
And now, a pauper unwanted, unseen
I embrace Death, as much as water seeks
scorched hearts devoid of tears
How grand you are, Oh Master
Great, King of all kings, unwreathed

It revolves like the earth, a planet bright
in dance fervour, embraces faceted
movements, how see you not, yet eyes
have you.. how claim your love for One, so true
Yet flee you do, when garments of the King
is granted, You!

The King messes not, with servants fare
yet servants dive to become pearls on fingers' wear
Pearls' seats are there for beauty's sake
Yet Beauty itself sees not its ugly fate
In the Mirrors of Life, revolving like the earth
a planet bright in dance fervour

Tags: Dance, Fear, Life, Sufi

Always...

http://AainaA.gaia.com — Sat, 01 Apr 2006 13:33:15 GMT

I'm not extremely fussy where "romance" is concerned. Christiana, an old girlfriend from the States, after reading my blog asked...

"What do you want? You seemed lost... and sad" she said.
"..." blank as usual because I never expect old friends to just call a quadrillion miles away from me, asking about current events in my life.
Like Gary, Christiana admitted to me, that women our age {whatever that means} must initiate the first move. Speechless, I let her talk, since she is making the call. She went on that I should confront the bloke I'm currently blogging about, and get into his pants.

LV who has been in Malaysia for the past month or so, said that I need a good **c*.

Blimey - Its difficult being a virgin in a virginless world. Express that to my female siblings, and they'd cringe at me. Why would AA want to get laid? She's an adopted alien, with an appetite for putting the world on its toes.

"...You've read it Christiana - You know me, I've never been in such a fix before - Remember what's his name .... Leonard?... that male model?"
"How can I forget... Yummy!" she giggled. A woman at almost 50 giggling about the past throws more than an insight. She was wild. She was also sane compared to most other women I've had the priviledge of meeting whilst living in Paris.
"...so how is this one different?"
"He's different. Il est français..and you know... ils sont differents quoi.." I sighed.
"...drop him! They cannot be trusted!" she quipped. Her first husband was French. He married her to get dual citizenship.
"..you want a french paper?" she asked me. Shocked, I couldn't find the answer.

".."

After a silence that felt like the world stood still for at least another millennia, I answered.

"No Christiana. I could've gotten that if I wanted aeons ago - but I was not prepared to embrace being "french" - I was too proud being Malaysian then. Besides, I could have gotten the papers two years ago when David offered a marriage of convenience"
"Yes... you even told many who thought you were American - I remember that. David? You didn't tell me this!!" she added, a bit annoyed. Its not like we communicated via email every single hour or week. How could I tell of David, when its past historic.
"No.. I'm not interested in being this or that - Its just that this gar is ... I don't know... he is .. Its not like me to be struck by such attraction for such a long time - its been what? ... 6 months now - I'm sure he must be good, otherwise I wouldn't be attracted to him. Its not like he's adonis," I added.
"He's not? He's rich at least?"
"I don't know..besides, it doesnt really matter does it?"
"Of course it matters.."
"The funny thing is... I've seen his visage in Paris, in a vision, do you remember the time when I was with Paolo?" I asked.

"Hahaha.. both of you were a hot item in school then..Of course I remember - You wanted the other, but ended up with Paolo - how can anyone forget" breathlessly she said without a pause.
"You see Christiana... I don't know anymore..I've seen this guy before, and yes, forgotten him for almost an eternity, and there..."
"...you were minding your heart, yes, I read the blog" she burst out laughing.

I don't know much. Hell, I don't know anything, but most of what I know and lived have been etched in my visions, or dreams. I've lived them all. Why I am attracted to you is beyond anything that can piece one and one together in your reality. Maybe I should just close the book. Maybe... I should just do that.

"No, you need to get laid... being a virgin for far too long can be detrimental - even for aliens" Christiana said, laughing hysterically.

Dina, over the short conversation this afternoon, asked why I'm still here in Kuala Lumpur. The city, heck - the country is too small. She knows me too well. She says I deserve Paris, and vice versa.

"Go AA, go! Don't wait... the longer you wait..,"
"I know... but I'm not in the position to leave. If I had the funds I would. I'm a fakiira, remember?" within, my heart cried, whilst trying to smile since I was in a meeting with a Media celebrity, who's now stationed in Kuala Lumpur.

Tonight, I shall close the book, and end the chapters. Life is too beautiful, to cry for another tsunami.

For you whom I've loved, you'll be within... for in the end, you will face none other than...

Always

Tags: life, love, lost, visions, virgin, sadness

Blessed, This Love

http://AainaA.gaia.com — Tue, 28 Mar 2006 09:32:49 GMT

Such sweetness to see you, to
embrace those eyes falling deeper
every moment like waterfalls, I thread softly
On the breaths of Love, your heart
whispers nothingness, what joy to breathe your
breath, to dance amidst cells, of wavelike
light particles, embracing moments
Between respiration, and heartbeats

O My Love, sweet sweet Love...
A word will do, though gestures rare can paint
The hot skies with trails of life, birthing a kiss
I long to touch, your senses calm me
Such delights, how I've missed you..
Tis bliss this glance
Tis blessed this Love

Je Vous Aime

Tags: love, Embrace, expressions

Of Faith, Love & ...

http://AainaA.gaia.com — Mon, 27 Mar 2006 12:54:09 GMT

The "Of Faith, Love, & ..." project will span about 100 chosen cities worldwide.

The mind is a world, a world that man makes and in which he will make his life in the hereafter, as the spider lives in the web it has woven.

Children, being the inheritors of the world deserve more than just food, and clothing. They deserve the best of what we can offer them, in terms of scholarship, initiation in the Arts and Sciences, as well as an awareness campaign to educate the importance of children in the world, as leaders of a better world.

The collaborative project of documenting the world via the lenses and write-up, and having the content produced and published as a coffee-table book, digitally syndicated via media discs and the Internet, will initiate a return of investment in the process to help manage and undertake programs for children worldwide.

The participants for the project are:

Delphine Camolli: Born in 1968 and raised in South of France, Delphine studied cinema in Paris, and thereafter worked for newspapers and cinematographic events. From 1998 to 2003, Delphine produced and directed her first documentary film with the photographer Irina Ionesco. Delphine currently resides in Marseille since 1995

AainaA-Ridtz A.R: A graduate in French Civilization; International Journalism and Creative Writing, she have won numerous awards, Laureate of the Concours du Roman de la Nouvelle Francophone, Honorary mentions for photography in International Photography Competitions and First prize in an International Poetry Competition. Her works have been published by Eyepiece Magazine US, Ark Publications, Mini-World Japan, International Herald Tribune and Nihon Keizai Shimbun. US' Money Museum is currently exhibiting her recent photographs until September 2006.

Dina Zaman: Recipient of British High Commissioner Chevening Award in 1998, Dina is an editor and writer. She has written extensively for the media, namely New Straits Time whereby she had a column titled 'Dina's Dalca'. She currently writes a weekly column titled, 'I am Muslim' for MalaysiaKini dotCom, which is about Muslim life in Malaysia. She also edits Malaysiakini's features section - Rentakini.com. Earlier this year, she was a production manager for a regional shoot on Muslims in South East Asia, which was produced by an Indonesian production house. She also writes about relationships for Chrome magazine

We're currently sourcing Sponsors / Angels to support our efforts to make this project successful. Do get in contact with me, at your earliest, if you think your Company will be in the position to play a role in it.

Sponsors we're looking for:

Government's Tourism Board for domestic travel, and transportation
Government's Ministry of Foreign Affairs for Visa, and travel documents
Hotel Lodging {B&B}
Air Carrier / Airlines
Managed Dedicated Hosting - For Streaming Video Documentary
Publishing - For Coffee Book

Tags: angels, children, world, project, International, Sponsors

When The Soul Speaks - VII

http://AainaA.gaia.com — Wed, 22 Mar 2006 09:15:27 GMT

Love is not just an emotion, nor is it just a name. It is, in the reality of all things perceived created or otherwise in a rooted world, a verb, and state of mind, an entity undefined - it cannot be defined as the "human's" complexities and intelligence is limited as it itself is.

To deny the reality of Love its true essence is to deny your very existence. Which one part is greater than what you could permissibly call yourself human, as the awakened “being human {as opposed to human beings}” is beyond all philosophical, cultural and religious cloaks that are being “religiously” veiling the human mind/heart from ever seeing the Light of Truth, glaringly shining like the Sun in broad daylight!

The human language is limited as it itself is a limited being. To expound something beyond the comprehension of the ordinary thinker is not impossible. Savants, many of whom were ignorant enough about the reality of the world around them, so much so, that they've been labeled insane, eccentric … and disfavored, have written and expounded on the subject itself in the hopes to cut a glimpse of this enshrouded entity - Love, God, Religion… and Faith.

To expound the finesse of the essence is almost impossibility for one who is inattentive in comprehension of all worlds, and universe with an open heart / mind. When fully spun into a silk garment will only the neophyte be allowed out of the polishing of its heart, a glimpse into what is known, in the ordinary world, a “sense” of freedom, beyond all conditionings … and death.

Only then, will the journey commence, and Love revealed in the hearts of lovers, whose rituals surpass that of the devotees. {of either religion, god, wealth, etcetera}

Tags: emotion, love, being human, Human beings, essence, complexities, undefined

Amor Ordinem Nescit

http://AainaA.gaia.com — Mon, 20 Mar 2006 11:12:37 GMT

"Hi...It's Me!" You said. But obviously for the veiled, I do not exist! What exists to them is just the package they see lounging infront of them inhaling with such pleasure the cigarette in her hand.

Wheez! Wheez! Cough! Wheez! Wheez! Cough!

Let's try this again shall we? So there I was contemplating a walk in the Garden, when out of the blue, the wind whispered your name. I'm waiting for the change to be undertaken, but you know that this will take a reflective breath before it happens in your world - or should I rephrase that and say, that it would take almost an eternity of breaths for the change to be visible in your reality. By the way, I'm not a mad poetess, or some deranged lunatic trying to make a difference in your world. I just happen to not know anything, and hence embraces almost everything within - and if you say you cannot "see" me within you, then something is definitely screwed up somewhere. I would like to think that its time to hand the Books over to them Readers of The Last Day, don't you think? Anway...

Everyone, as I've mentioned earlier on..over the Internet, is connected by that invisible thread I'd call, "Particled Life" - condensed light which does not perceive its own reality. This thread which is finer than the nanometer's breadth of your hair, of the cells, and of all veils apparent or hidden is condensed that when squashed together or coalesce becomes - or is being made apparent to the same condensation of unperceived light amongst itself. Once you make a connection in your "apparent" reality, there is no way you can severe that "relationship" whether it be of "love", "hate" even after the other has passed across the treshold of life, or in your language "Death". Nor should you even attempt at overstepping the limits of lusts for the profit of the ego. Because when you do this, you literally "kill" yourself. And then you'd have to start all over again - or didn't your parents teach you anything?

Ad absurdum

No! Its not absurd - I tell you its not. It just doesnt make sense now, but when you've climbed out of your shell, or your lifeless body when you would have crossed the treshold of life, then you'll know, but then it'll be a tad too late to do anything right? So... hark! or should that be read as "heed!"

"What ever beauty may be, it has for its basis order, and for its essence unity" ~ Father Andre

So, when you make this invisible connection in your world, you are reverting to your true essence in the hidden. If you severe a connection that has been there all along, but because of your ignorance and conceited blindness even when eyes you have, and you are not able to perceive your "reality" therein, then ... if you prefer to dive in the enraged ocean, by all means, "...Jump!"

But if you start ignoring your reflections therein your world, or your reality, and start behaving like an ignoramus - arrogant and all, then when The Readers will bear witness to your Book {of Records} don't say that I didn't warn you. There is such a thing as "death" you know, its as real as your sleep, and waking up in your reality, as real as your experiences herein this world you call "Earth".

Appreciate the moment you have with even the most minute of creature, for they tell a story, and guide you to that Great Room, where Lovers bask in Eternal Glory!

"I offer you peace. I offer you love. I offer you friendship. I see your beauty. I hear your need. I feel your feelings My wisdom flows from the Highest Source. I salute that Source in you. Let us work together for unity and love." ~ Mahatma Gandhi

Amicule, deliciae, num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Love...Ad infinitum

Tags: life, unity, , living, essence, The Reflections

When The Soul Speaks - VI

http://AainaA.gaia.com — Tue, 14 Mar 2006 04:59:43 GMT

As death becomes the separation of reality and deception, dreams for awakened souls are notches in the Book of Life.

Being the centre of all living activities, the heart record experiences, and thoughts undertaken and not. Being the screen that projects what is and is not within the reflective heart, the mind when awakened realizes its source as the leaves, from the Tree of Life. Awakened, the heart realizes its origin at the Seat of Reality.

Guard the heart; for when tormented as Love matures within, passes through a stage between living, and flight. When the heavens assume the earth, when a beloved consumes the lover, is as fire transform to Light.

The "agent provocateur" is the separation that marks a distinction between the beginning and the end, the first and the last, the apparent and the hidden, the beloved and the lover, and fire in to Light.

http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/24360/when_the_soul_speaks_vi.html

Tags: heart, life, love, spirituality, sufism, light, Fire

Heaven Of Angels

http://AainaA.gaia.com — Mon, 13 Mar 2006 11:53:59 GMT

To feel, each embrace
As you prepare
A love feast with another
Tears me asunder
Slowly in a feverish lust
Wanting yet pushing away
Veils of heat, burning… slowly
Devouring my very essence of
Freedom amidst flights of frenzy
Amongst a million familiar faces,
Voices, touches, and hard penetration
Coming within an ocean of Indian
Summer, these lips quiver in a wanton desire
Cravings unlike I could never imagine even
In a million years of millennia
Unlike any demon raped minds, splashes
Of paint, slowly toiled amidst brushes
Slowly sucking thy lips, hard, take me now
Give pleasure a name, sex seemed pale
Beyond comparison to what images you have prayed
Upon the Altar of Life, amidst burnt candles
Whispering my names, each limb tears a million
Starbursts, giving life to a Heaven of Angels
Praying for humanity.., how sweet thy poison sting
Must I endure this breathless fever and devour each
Other being watching silently as I die a euphoric
Death awaiting your kisses, blistered pollen driven stamens
Devoid of scents sucked out by the nose creating
An unforgettable trail of lusts on bodies and folds of
Beings in fervor submission… euphoria tears a bliss, a tear from
This heart, oh sweet love, calm thy passion for the ocean
Bursts a thousand rainbows, for artists to paint, imagining
Light upon light upon a secret desire of pleasure
Only the universe can birth planets and quantum energies
Rapture amidst black holes, oh take me now, sweet love
Thy presence beckons death, with a willing heart I unbolt
The Gates of Life, a moment for an embrace
Embracing thy bosoms hard against plush gardens of silk
The sun shines… welcoming you home

Je Vous Aime

Tags: life, love, lust, sex, Sensual Love

Sacré Coeur

http://AainaA.gaia.com — Wed, 08 Mar 2006 10:04:15 GMT

Haven't I been living before?

Oh such sorrow, to be
without you....Such aches, where only you
can heal.. this heart yearns, yet freedom is trickling
along these very veins...for a glimpse of heaven
on this tightrope of life, where love
inexplicable, strings the violins of my heart

After another tub of Mars Ice-cream {I must stop this habit! But Malaysia is scorching these days - yeah, another excuse!}, I tried to forget you.

Obviously the tub didn't work. I think I need another strategy. Dina sms'd me saying that after she had spoken to me last night, she felt sad. Funny how the transference of energy can be easily absorbed in this world non?

She felt my heart, and yes, I've been feeling very sad and alone for the past month or so...

In my prayers, for myself, I've asked The Lord for comfort... of the heart. My heart is being tossed like centimes these days. Not seeing you, or seeing you does not help - I'm falling deeper by the ottosecond, and I am as clueless to this new experience. When I was younger, I never had the need to fall "in" love. I was too busy trying to figure things out. Now that I've more or less figured things out, my heart and the body are being practically ripped apart, like raindrops falling hard on concrete or the soul living a dead body. The blows - all too new for me can sometimes be a welcomed affliction, sometimes... inexplicable because I'm slowly discovering that love, on a human level is complex, and breathless.

If this is the end, you're my Angel...of Death, and I want you

Breaths escape my heart. Each time I see you, I wish the world just stood still. I try to keep the image of you, for as long, and as fresh as it can aspire to be within the heart. I'm missing you more and more, and .... sadness reigns. Your shy smile, the quiver in your voice when you speak with your colleagues, the twinkle in your eye, the way you keep on wearing the same socks for a week {unless like me, you have a dozen of the same!}, the ...perfection of your being, your face... and the almost invisible scar above your pink lips is slowly devouring my very essence of innocence.

Flirting and teasing are the two things I used to be savvy in. These days, I'm numbed. I don't know how to even contemplate a move, let alone open my mouth to speak. It used to be simple to just say things. Oh Lord - Help!!. If I had a wand, you'd be the only one on this planet. And you are, within. The other odd thing I noticed about myself, is that I don't look nor do I study other men since I met you. My friends say I've been struck by the blow... of life.

The cab driver who has been driving me to Carrefour noticed the change in me, and decided to cheer me up by talking about religion. I wish he would just stop. I'm not in the mood for debating about Islaam, Christianity, or even ignorance. Words are all I have at the moment.... for they pen my innermost spirit, the wings which are being held down from flying... home

Je Vous Aime

Tags: experience, heart, learning, life, love, sacred, Embrace, loving

Embrace The Love

http://AainaA.gaia.com — Mon, 06 Mar 2006 05:53:15 GMT

Unbreathe,
Undo the madness, retrace your steps
One by one
Backwards and remember
The chilling taste
Of Summer

The kisses
Tears
Embrace The Love

Tags: joy, pain, Embrace

Succulent Affair

http://AainaA.gaia.com — Mon, 06 Mar 2006 05:05:20 GMT

Dark, his skin beckons
Me to taste and slice the meat
Off, enriched with goodness
Only the heart can savour
Though through the tongue
Its bitter-sweetness reigns
Alike a king
Sweet, pungent and killing
Acidic, the flowing juice, a
Reminiscent of past joys

Sweet renderings, tis sweet as honey
This love I miss amidst
tasting pleasures, none have I miss
amidst displeasures
the groins of nature plucked
like raisins sweet ready
to be squashed and trampled
like bodies intertwine

How beauty colours the brazen
Jars in winter pure, hardened
Embracing juice in dark cellars
A succulent affair
That drenches the body warm to
Silent madness of twirls, spirals
And dances… meshed between
Blood and soul

Tags: life, love, unity, taste